Saturday, August 16, 2003

The Previous Twenty Four Hours on Planet Earth:



"The researchers claim this is the first photograph of a minke whale letting one go in the icy waters of Antarctica. It was taken from the bow of a research vessel.

"We got away from the bow of the ship very quickly ... it does stink," said Nick Gales, a research scientist from the Australian Antarctic Division.
[More . . .]



LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Diminutive actor Gary Coleman and porn actress Mary Carey were unveiled on Friday as two of the five candidates set to compete in the Game Show Network's "debate" ahead of California's unprecedented gubernatorial recall election. [More . . .]



Garden Tractor Racing at the Pine Lake Volunteer Fire Department. [More . . . ]

I nominate the previous twenty four hours as the strangest ones ever.

"Nader Still an idiot - Our story at 11, after sports, weather and a new way to help clean out your cat's colon that many people don't know about!"


I'm still not sure what's easier to parody - Ralph Nader or Local News.

Back to the knee-jerkiness


Nader would've prevented 9/11. And the New York blackout. These are both examples where stronger consumer rights (including strengthed tort lawsuits) would have saved the nation. Instead, we have the commisioner of the goverment agency charged with making sure that products don't kill people saying that she doesn't "give a rat's ass" about the problems parents might have in taking care of multiple children (this was a public meeting regarding a bath seat which has a tendency to overturn and trap children in bathtubs). We have a president whose philosophy on the damage caused by forest fires is that we should get rid of more of the forest (instead of the idiots who build their homes in tinderboxes) -- I can't wait to see the extension of this after the next hurricane blows through Florida and destroys homes people decided to build while the tide was out.

On the other hand, President Nader would also have banned bikinis as they might lead to increased rates of skin cancer, and this something that we must, never, never allow.

I agree with Brian on the most important of issues -- women must retain their right to expose themselves as much as possible. Wicked Weasel? Where do you find this stuff?

Hello Darkness, my old friend


A satellite photo of New York City last night:

sucker!

That's the night that the lights went out in the Northeast...

Thursday, August 14, 2003

Cultural Insensitivities


A MELBOURNE council wants to have men-only swim sessions for blokes too shy to be seen in their bathers at the local pool.

In what is believed to be an Australian first, the Moonee Valley City Council is seeking an exemption from anti-discrimination laws to allow men-only swim times at the Ascot Vale Sports and Leisure Centre.

If approved, women will be banned from the pool, and even from watching men frolic in the water from the sidelines, during the blokes-only bathing sessions.

Brooke LeSueur, the council's co-ordinator of leisure facilities development, said the push for women-free swimming came from a local Islamic men's group but the night sessions will be open to all men.
[More . . .]

Once again, we see where a vocal minority is intent on trashing the cultural heritage of millions of Australians. The Aussie beach heritage is something to treasure, something to behold, and yes, something to be envious of:



Unlike the uptight Americans and Europeans, the simple Aussie can take pleasure in the beauty of a bikini, a microbikini and yes, the microminimus bikini ($AUD 32.00). A simple culture with a heritage of beachwear that goes back for generations, the Aussies are under attack from the militant religious right, and yet nobody seems to care.

"Will nobody htink of the bikini models?"

Finally!



Sam and Jan finally make it to the beach. It took long enough.
Yes, I've now taken to getting my jollies through line drawings. Ann Telnaes, yer next.

Tuesday, August 12, 2003

We have just lost the initiative



BAGHDAD, Iraq - All troops in Iraq (news - web sites) should expect to serve for at least a year, with brief rest breaks in the region and possibly a few days at home, the commander of U.S. forces said Tuesday. That came as news to some soldiers.

"It's a one-year rotation," Lt. Gen. Ricardo Sanchez told The Associated Press in an interview. "Every soldier has been told that they'll be deployed for a year, and then at the end of the year we'll be working to send them home."

But some of the 148,000 soldiers in Iraq said nobody told them how long they would remain in the country, where guerrillas attack Americans daily and high temperatures often top 120 degrees.
[More . . . ]


When the Commander of US Forces in Somalia saw the first Blackhawk go down he announced over the circuit: "That's it - we just lost the iniative." Now that almost everybody in Iraq has just become a double digit midget, we too, have lost the initiative.

The NVA always wondered why we relied on the 13 month rotation policy - it's obvious you can't win wars that way they would say.

Monday, August 11, 2003

Locks on the door . . . Yeah . . . That's the ticket!



Likely 2004 third-party presidential hopeful Ralph Nader thinks the 9/11 terrorist attacks wouldn't have happened if he had been president. He claims that amid all the big decisions new presidents have to make after inauguration, he would have ordered cockpit doors to be hardened against attack. He says an old report warning about how easy it is to get in the cockpit still sticks with him.[More . . .]

"And I'd've put a big brace between those two buildings! Yeah! And I would've sent everyone on the plane to one of those spy movie karate schools! That's the ticket!"