Friday, September 03, 2004

Don't get me wrong

I'm all for girl-on-girl-on-girl-on-girl-on-guy-on-sheep action (which, I guess, makes me a Democrat — whatever), and I've watched a few Michael Moore films. And a few Woody Allen movies. And I laughed really loud at Jesse Jackson reading "Green Eggs and Ham" on Saturday Night Live, if that counts as support.

Would I beat up a cop on a moped? No. Would I beat up an undercover pro-establishment agitator? Well, there, the line gets a little fuzzy.

Don't worry. I'm in Florida, I'm voting, and I have a secret plan to ensure that the election goes to the Democrats. No, I will not discuss it. No, it has nothing to do with hacking into the polling machines. No, you cannot guess it. Yes, I will get email about it. I don't mind. I'm doing my little part, and for that, I am a patriot.
I'm a lover, not a fighter — unless I'm wrestling, and then I'm gonna kick a$$. Unless my partner is female, in which case I'm interested in pinning. No, I do not require your aforementioned vegetable oil. Unlike the war in Iraq, my skill in the bedroom is not predicated on oil.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Not Buying it.

I know you and I just can't see you hanging with those id-jit rock throwing anarchists. You may be passionate about your beliefs, but you hanging out at hotels to push around little old ladies with Bush buttons or laying spread eagle on the pavement to represent some repressed minority somewhere just doesn't work for me.

What buggers my mind is that you count yourself among them ideologically - and I know you better than that. The likelihood of you pummeling a cop on a moped into a coma just doesn't ring true to me at all.

Frankly, imagining you marching lock step down 5th Ave arm in arm with Michael Moore and Jesse Jackson actually sends me into giggle fits, because I know that you'd be trying to figure out which lesbians had just returned from making out with eachother.

So, please, stay in FL where your vote will do your cause some good. Just hunker down, eh?
"Excuse me ladies, you seem very commited to sapphic politics. Can you please cover eachother wih this bottle of Anti-Bush Pro-Choice Organic Vegetable Oil and wrestle on this Kerry Edwards sign for me? It's for a good cause . . . "


How many arrests have been made in New York? You just know I'd be in the stir. Plus, there's a thing more ferocious than a storm in New York, but I won't get into that. Well, not right now, at least.

On the other hand, New York, despite the convention, is a solid blue state. I know where my nation needs me, and it's where I can put a Kerry/Edwards sign on a lawn until a hurricane blows it away.

My bet? The SETI signal, the new planets discovered, and increased "Black Triangle" sitings are all evidence of intergalatic things afoot. How did the aliens travel around in "Close Encounters"? In the middle of a big storm cloud. A storm cloud the size of Texas could hold a lot of ships.
I, for one, welcome our new alien overlords, and would like to remind them that as a blogger, I can help prepare the populace for their roles as slaves.

Hurricane Francis: A New Hope

Discovery Channel :: News :: NASA's Newest Foe: Hurricane Frances: "'If there were serious damage to one or two of the orbiters or the facilities needed to process and launch the orbiters, I think it would raise a very large question about the continuation of the shuttle program," Logsdon said."
This would be a great way to get Nasa on track
Hold on to your hat Sean, you should have stayed in NYC


Silent Running: 'Black Triangle' Sightings on the Rise: "Rather, it is consistent with (a) the routine and open deployment of an unacknowledged advanced DoD aircraft or (b) the routine and open deployment of an aircraft owned and operated by non-DoD personnel, suggests the NIDS study."

As someone who is on the record as saying there are little green men (Not from Mars), and I will be seeing them in my lifetime. Let me be the first to say what needs to be said: As cool as these 'Triangles' are they are Terrestrial. What would make them even cooler is if we deploy them at the Mexican border with phazers or a 50 caliber machine gun.
Was I the only one who thought that Zell Miller looked liked an Irish Step Dancer?

As you were . . .

His salute is fine - thumb is tucked in and his arm is as straight as can be expected under the circumstances. Furthermore, he is returning a salute even though he is not required to do so - a superior under a load (th' dawg) could just as easily return the salute with a simple "As you were."

What I can't understand is who they're saluting. There must be a sailor or marine off camera that we can't see. He *can't* be saluting that member of the Air Force with him - it's just not done.
Again, though, the other guy has made a name for himself as a war hero - he's supposed to know how to do it. My guy was just some flaky weekend fighter jock, right?

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Shower Shoe? Don't you mean flip-flop?

What would your instructor have done if you saluted like this?

I bet you weren't even allowed to take your dog to boot camp, were you?

Clinton did better . . .

The one time I popped a salute as sloppy as this in boot camp, my company commander made me wear a shower shoe on my hand for a day. After that little piece of humiliation I can proudly say that you could use my entire forearm as a straight edge.
I question the timing and track of Hurricaine Frances! Once again we see the Republicans willing to go to any extreme to exploit a national tragedy!

Freak Show

From Drudge:

What a total stooge. How many times did we see a finger wagging Rush Limbaugh in Boston shouting down (that's called reasoned debate these days) some minion of Franken's?

What a freak show. Toss this turkey in with the losers who are attacking delegates on Broadway and at restaurants. Funny how I don't recall any of this happening in Boston.

By the way, the lamest thing in thirty years of SNL was Stuart Smalley. And that's saying something.
Why is it I'm thinking that if Limbaugh had done something like this, we'd be hearing about the "crushing of dissent".

Tuesday, August 31, 2004


We have the same beard. This is very troubling.
I may have to do something about this

Monday, August 30, 2004

The Real Police State

Third-grader arrested for disorderly conduct
ESPANOLA, N.M. (AP) — An Espanola third-grader was handcuffed and arrested by police after hitting another student with a basketball, the child's mother and her lawyer say.

[ . . . ]

According to a juvenile citation for disorderly conduct, Jerry Trujillo was arrested Thursday and booked into the Espanola jail after he "got out of control and refused to go back to class."
[More . . .]

I am horrified to say that this doesn't surprise me in the least. Thanks to the Victim's Rights Movement, the Zero Tolerance Movement and the Child Safety Nazis, I'm seeing more and more of this.

I can pull from my files right now several juveniles who have been charged with FELONY child abuse because they got into fights at school with a person under the age of 17. I also have a young juvenile girl who was charged with misdemeanor theft when she took another girls shoes. The shoes were recovered before the charges were filed.

Oh, and those setencing enhancers that the states all embraced for drug crimes committed within 1000' of a school zone? I haven't defended a single adult with that enhancer - they've all been children (many of whom are sharing their Ritalin).

Most of these statutes were enacted in the 1990s. Draw your own conclusions, puny Earthling.
Okay, I overstated my evidentiary case and you busted me for it. What do you want? A medal? How about one with a Combat "V"?


Dude, Steve Gardner served on the boat with him. Which also means that he was in the Navy at the same time as JFK. Steve Gardner seems to be calling Kerry a liar.

Larry Thurlow, Van Jack Chenoweth, and Van Odell were on the water with him on March 13th 1969. They all counter Kerry's story.

Michael Medeiros who appeared with JFK at the DNC even said that they never went beyond the border of Cambodia, and he didn't recall dropping off the Special Forces in Cambodia.

Let's not forget the photo that the Kerry campaign has been using, only 3 officers in the photo say he is fit to be the DIC. To be fair 2 are "N/A" and two others are dead. The others all say that he is "Unfit". They must have served with Kerry if Kerry used the photo in his campaign? Right???

Brian, I know your cat, and the VRWC would do well to run him over. Before he takes over the world.

Gonna pickup my back ordered copy of the book today

Hey I bet even The Dead don't like John Kerry

Our Cherished Fake Newscasters Welcome Delagates to New York

Terrence has no idea about Jon Stewart. Poor bastard.

Sunday, August 29, 2004

Your evidence is sooooo hard, you stud!

The SBVT guys provided direct evidence? That's news to me. What I heard were a bunch of people talking, some of whom were merely in the Navy at the same time as John Kerry.

My dad was in the Air Force during that period. He could claim that he served with Kerry and McCain. He doesn't. I'm not positive, Brian, but I think your dad was in around the same time. Tell me, what are his memories of Kerry?

Show me the photos and DNA, if such existed. Otherwise, all I keep hearing are the testimonials of people (and the odd hampster) whose lives were saved by John Kerry.
It's not that I didn't see the posting insulting my love of wrestling. Or that I didn't get the email referencing the post and inviting me to evaluate your new computer. It's that I'm still trying to figure out the proper way to respond.

So That's What It Looks Like!

In case you wondered what a failing campaign looks like, here it is:
Web of Connections

Speaking purely as a guy who does a little bit of defense work for a living, I can tell you that the generally accepted heirarchy of proof is:

1. Direct Evidence (photos, DNA)
2. Circumstantial Evidence (bloody gloves)
3. Testimonial Evidence (eyewitnesses, confessions, hearsay)
4. Motive
5. Opportunity

No we remember that all detective shows in the 1980s dealt purely with #4, and that would generally be enough. In the real world, we'd like to see more of nos. 1 and 2, but we invariably have to deal with #3 on a regular basis.

So what the Kerry gang has given us is loads of #4 and a touch of #3. What the SBVT guys have given us is mounds of #1. And the testimony of one Citizen Kerry on April 22, 1971 gives us a bit more of #1 (although he relied heavily on #3 in the Winter Soldier testimony)

When you start breaking out the flow charts, you start looking more and more like defunct Texas oil barrons with ears that should've been tacked back decades ago.
A Flow Chart! Maybe we'll get a pretty Powerpoint presentation next!

Unignored Gauntlet

"Can you point to one, just one TV ad from the Kerry campaign or a 527 that lies about the President?"

I actually can't. This isn't because of my brainwashing by the VRWC or because they are threatening to run over my cat with the Republican Attack Machine. It's because I simply lack the ability to see any of the teevee ads right now - and I rather like it.

But I will tell you this - Kerry and his supporters have gone out of their way since 2000 to impugn W's reputation, his intelligence and his character. They have accused him of smuggling drugs into Florida in the 80s, they have cited "evidence" that he is the least intelligent man to ever hold the office.

They have even suggested that he personally knew of and refused to do anything about 9/11.

So, no, I cannot point to just one TV ad that tells lies about the president. I can instead point to four years of the most ruthless attacks that any modern politician has had to endure. And he has done so with grace. And that drives Michael Moore, et al up the wall.

What if W would give them just one good drunken Nixonian rant? What if W would just lose his cool and do an eye-bulging Clinton screaming fit? He won't - it's simply not in the man's nature.

Quietly leaning over to a friend and referring to the editor of a national daily as a fucking asshole? Yup. Can do, has done.

It is a question of style, that's all.

What Kerry doesn't get isn't that most of us give a damn about his activities in some firefight in 1968 or 1969. I'm sure he did a fine job, as defined by the circumstances of the day. What we give a damn about are his actions in 1971 and 1972 when he was with the VVAW - those two years, I believe are a stronger indicator of the man's charather then four months under fire.

He went to war to be Audy Murphy. When that didn't pay off, he became Abby Hoffman.
And why exactly is his Silver Star certificate signed by SECNAV John Lehman, who served under Reagan fully eight years after Kerry "gave back" his medals (ribbons, whatever) in a very public manner?