Saturday, September 11, 2004

Friday, September 10, 2004

Tool for Brian

Here's something you might like (if you don't have it already):

<a href="">
<img src="" alt="EV">

which produces:



Let the Vast Left Wing Conspiracy Begin!

Karl dropped out of college because after his little stunt (stealing letterhead, inviting the dregs of society to ruin a Democratic candidate's campaign headquarters opening, and then brag about it), he was investigated by the head of the GOP National at the time, George H.W. Bush (keep in mind this happened right around Watergate and the Republicans were getting a black eye with their dirty tricks) who hired him.

That said, I'm curious about where 60 Minutes got these documents. If I were a conspiracy theorist, I would think that Karl might have manufactured it simply for the purposes of decrying Kerry's smear tactics. I've considered changing the blog to use only non-proportional fonts as a show of solidarity against Karl's tactics, but who knows? Maybe it was manufactured by an exceptionally stupid Dem. It certainly takes some focus from the "Texans for Truth" ad. Not that Bush doesn't have anything else to hide.

Keep in mind that Karl isn't above planting a listening device in his own office to try to mix things up a little.

Oh, and bunches of law enforcement agencies want the ban preserved; they claim it helped keep crime low (what the hell do they know?).

Dude, you're in a blue state. I'm in a dead-heat state. Electorally speaking, our boys are in a dead-heat. You might want to read through the Rassmussen Report which shows Bush as having a slight lead, but shows both of us in Toss-Up states. It's hard to say. I don't think anyone's able to say that the fly-over country belongs to anyone since Illinois, Iowa, Michigan, Minnesotta, and Wisconsin all lean Kerry &mdash according to the map you referred to! You and I know that, sans Madison, Wisconsin is pretty socially conservative. I assure you that Iowa falls in that category as well. These are the key parts of the fly-over country, so I don't know what the hell you're thinking.

Maybe those parts of the country are plugged-in enough to know that your boy didn't show up when he was supposed to. Maybe they think he's messed up because he's from Connecticut, Yale and Harvard educated, yet has a Texan accent (only one in the family). And the dude is afraid of horses. I challenge you to show me a picture of him anywhere near one. People in MN think that's just stupid.

People are tired of a guy who had four years to put in place a national agenda, find and/or kill Osama bin Laden, fix Iraq, and turn the economy around. Your dude gave a speech at the convention that sounded like he'd never even been in office. What, has he been waiting until the election so he could get a real mandate? His party controls all three branches of government — what does he want to do that he can't? He's tight with the Saudis — during the debates, he promised to jawbone them — why can't he keep gas prices low? Why didn't he mention his Mission to Mars during his speech (or any speech, really, since he first mentioned it)? Why is he so afraid to mention Osama when he loves to talk about Saddam?

He's a miserable failure and he's on his way out. My prediction? Kerry landslide.

At least Dick Cheney's got an excellent grasp of the economy. Too bad he only passed two bills in Congress, as opposed to Kerry's 57 (why was Cheney attacking Kerry's record?).

Thursday, September 09, 2004

That's the counteroffensive?

Boy, these guys could screw up a wet dream. Imagine this - Karl Rove has just hit you right square between the eyes with the Number Three Flat Shovel. Reeling from the pain, you reach for the nearest weapon you can find - AHA! Forged documents!

But suddenly, just as you're about to whip them out, the digital brownshirts expose your docs for all the world to see! The flat shovel comes down once more - nobody has been hit this hard since Mondale carried Minnesota. Momentarily, you blank out and your life flashes before your eyes. Unfortunately, it's only the Carter years.

Karl is done with the flat shovel. He's been rooting around the shed while you were blacked out and has found the oldest, meanest, rustiest pitchfork ever seen by human eyes. This pitchfork is so nasty, it was banned by the Transylvanian Bureau of Pitchforks and Torches. So you grab for your weapon of choice - the 12 gauge. But just as you're about to thumb the first round into it's semiautomatic maw, you discover that your guy sponsored legislation to have it banned.

But hey! You've got powerful friends in the publishing industry who will always help in a pich! From your prone position on the floor, you reach for your advance copy of The Family: The Real Story of the Bush Dynasty to block the blow from the Pitchfork of Mass Destruction. Unfortunately, the book falls apart like some government built Vehicle Assembly Building in a Florida rainstorm.

Abandoned by your friends, your preferred weapon of choice rendered politically incorrect, the truth ripped from you like so many barking caterpillars, you fall back on the one thing you've always relied upon - his wife's European sensibilities.

As the PMD slowly pokes it's way through your tie-dye, cracking your Michael Moore DVD and shredding the latest issue of the New Yorker, you can hear Karl grumbling under his breath, "Welcome to the Red part of the map. We own your asses here."
Interesting point - Karl Rove is not a college grad. Really.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Florida Power Restored in Time for Touch-Screen Voting

I'm back! Sadly, I don't really have enough time right now to discuss the stupidest thing I've ever heard from a fascist, but I will soon.
By the way, my dad (5000+ hours of flight time) said that he's spent more time in the bathroom while flying than Bush spent flying. Totally unsolicited quote from him.

The Gang that couldn't shoot straight

So much for Vacuum Sealed for your protection.

stunned mission scientists fell silent as they watched live aerial pictures of the capsule spinning out of control and crashing into the desert floor.

These are the folks who are going to get us to Mars?

And so it begins . . .

Calif. to Sue Diebold Over False Claims

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - California Attorney General Bill Lockyer said on Tuesday he would sue electronic voting machine maker Diebold Inc. on charges it defrauded the state with false claims about its products.

Secretary of State Kevin Shelley has said Diebold deceived California with aggressive marketing that led to the installation of touch-screen voting systems that were not tested or approved nationally or in California.
[More . . . ]

The morning of Wednesday, November 3rd 2004 has just started. We will now hear that members of Diebold's Board of Directors are large Republican campaign donors, we will hear that these machines were especially targeted to swing states like Ohio and Florida, and we will hear that this is all part of the VRWC.

That is because the press and the assembled multitudes will forget that instead of running a centrist governor from a southern or western state, the Dems chose to run the haughty, French-looking junior Senator from Massachusetts who, by the way, served in Vietnam.

It's the candidate, stupid.
More evidence that Florida is the New California

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

West Asian Fare Trade Agreement

I'm thinking on the whole, I'd rather lose 1000 soldiers in Iraq then lose 150 school children in my own backyard. Not to be coarse, but that is, after all, why we have soldiers.

But then I think that the Russians have lost thousands in Chechnya while losing hundreds at home.

I suspect that in World War III, like in the first two, the Russians will bear the brunt of the casualties both civillian and military. Doesn't seem fair, but I recognize a trend when I see one.
I think we oughta lend-lease 'em some of our equipment again. Hell, even the decommed ten year old stuff would beat what they're using on a regular basis.

Waiting for Malcom X

From Mark Steyn:
When your asymmetrical warfare strategy depends on gunning down schoolchildren [in the Beslan school], you're getting way more asymmetrical than you need to be. The reality is that the IRA and ETA and the ANC and any number of secessionist and nationalist movements all the way back to the American revolutionaries could have seized schoolhouses and shot all the children.

But they didn't. Because, if they had, there would have been widespread revulsion within the perpetrators' own communities. To put it at its most tactful, that doesn't seem to be an issue here.
[More . . . ]

I guess I'm still waiting for a Nelson Mandela, a Mohatma Ghandhi or even a Malcom X to show up in the Arab world. Somebody to put a face on the movement and hold themselves accountable for the actions of the rabble. But then again, such an individual would likely be targeted by another faction.
One side here is rooting for Bush to lose and Kerry to win. How would you like to be in agreement with the one rooting for Kerry?


Repeat after me: "Islam is a religon of Peace"